2014 FF Draft Work: Team 1

Fantasy football season is upon us yet again.  I had 3 drafts the previous weekend.  Like any great artist, I like to take a moment to step back and appreciate my work. I am definitely caught in the HUB undertow at the moment but I surfaced for just long enough to write about my first draft.  Maybe I'll be able to write about the others before my brain is completely fried.  This league is comprised of all co-workers and it's also the one I expect to give and receive the most trash talk for. 

Unless you're in the league, I'm going to assume the likelihood of you reading any further is only slightly higher than my chances of landing a date with Jennifer Lawrence. Below is my team with the round I selected the player.  I'll humor myself that someone is going to click here to see the full draft results.  In addition to the thoughts on the players I acquired, my general draft strategy for this year is revealed.  Feedback on anything you see is always appreciated.

Setup - 12 team; .5 PPR; 4th pick

QB – Tony Romo (8th round)
RB – Matt Forte (1st)
RB – Rashad Jennings (4th)
WR – Jordy Nelson (2nd)
WR – Antonio Brown (3rd)
TE – Antonio Gates (11th)
WR/TE (WR) – Emmanuel Sanders (7th)
K – Dan Bailey (15th)
DEF – Bengals (12th)
BN (QB) – Phillip Rivers (10th)
BN (RB) – Toby Gerhart (5th)
BN (RB) – Pierre Thomas (6th)
BN (WR) – Terrance Williams (9th)
BN (TE) – Eric Ebron (13th)
BN (DEF) – Bills (14th)

There’s a clear-cut top 5 in most drafts so I was thrilled to pull a top 5 pick. In fact, #4 might even be the number I most prefer. I had no problem taking whatever was left and I got a sooner pick on the way back.

My starting WRs are both guys I have in my top 10. Generally speaking, in any draft this year, I find the back half of the top 10 WRs to be a better pool of players to choose from than the back half of the top 10 RBs. Especially with an elite RB, I was confident in my ability to cobble together a collection of RBs to compete for the #2 spot. (That went even better than I expected.)

If you can see all of my teams, you might think I’m the biggest Antonio Brown fan. I prefer consistency over the boom-or-bust guys (I’m looking at you, DeSean Jackson). Brown had at least 6 catches in every game last year. Plus he’s got the best smile in the NFL.

I had Bernard and Vereen snatched up 1 pick before me, but in the grand scheme of things, they were minor annoyances. I was, however, pleasantly surprised to see Jennings’ name still on the board when I was ready to return my focus to RB.

Gerhart’s carries might result in three yards and a cloud of dust, but it’s all about volume with him. I could do worse for a backup RB, and the same could be said for the criminally underrated (in PPR formats) Pierre Thomas.

I’m loving my flex selection of Sanders more by the minute with every Wes Welker concussion.

I feel that once you miss out on the big 3 at QB, you’re well served to wait and pair a couple quality options. That’s exactly what I did with Romo and Rivers who are both perfectly capable of delivering top 10 seasons at the position. People always seem to mistake real-football shortcomings for fake-football shortcomings when it comes to Romo. He often ends up my team because of that and I’ve never really regretted it.

It’s hard to be strong everywhere and TE is my weakest position. I’m banking on Gates being able to hold off Father Time for another season, and I’m not disappointed to call him my starter.

My biggest disappointments came when filling out my bench, which should tell you how strongly I feel about this team. Julian Edelman kept slipping and I would have been ecstatic to call him my #4 WR had he lasted just 2 picks longer. Instead, I went with Williams over the buzzy Brandin Cooks. I guess potentially using him with Romo some weeks was the tiebreaker.

I also wanted to double down on Chargers tight ends. In addition to being on everyone’s TE sleeper list, Ladarius Green would have made a nice insurance policy for Gates. My nemesis Scott poached both Edelman and Green from me.

The Bengals figure to be another strong DST unit again.

The Bills and Ebron are picks I’m already considering cutting but whatever; maybe I can pick up big ‘ol Matt Adams as my reserve TE (inside joke). 

So Yahoo graded my draft a B+ for whatever it’s worth (probably a place in the sewer). I felt that was a little low but it was also the highest grade they gave out. I should have little trouble reaching the playoffs again. I won’t predict a championship but that’s only because T.J. Housmandzadeh doesn’t play anymore.

Q101: 2010

How did we get here?

2010 (Or, the year the music stopped…but on a good note)

5. “Substitution” – Silversun Pickups

When reactions turn into hurricanes / And the middle ground seems a little tame / Whether full or empty it's all the same / It's so easy to see, everyone can agree, you're not to blame

I already showed these guys some love in 2009 and here they are again in the top 5.  I thank my former co-worker Matt for sharing his library of Silversun Pickups albums with me.  Swoon is my favorite album they’ve released thus far and “Substitution” is probably my favorite track off of that album.  The mellow upbeat tone just hits the spot.  Fun fact: The women playing musical chairs in the video were actually playing for a real prize.  According to Silversun frontman Brian Aubert, it got pretty ugly.

4. “Odd One” – Sick Puppies

Odd one, you're never alone / I'm here and I will reflect you / Both of us basically unattached / To anything or anyone unless we're pretending

Sick Puppies aren’t one of my favorites but they get to join the party.  I think it’s worth noting that I consider the top 5 of 2010 to be a strong collection of songs.  Maybe I latched onto “Odd One” because the lyrics attempted to soothe the disconnected feelings so many of us have had.  I could try to relay some story about being an “odd one” that comes with a hidden agenda, but I’m abandoning that approach for this year.  As the years progressed in this mini-series, it became less about the music and more about stories unrelated to the music.  We’re in the final year of the countdown and it should be as much about the music as possible, plain and simple.

3. “Give Me A Sign” – Breaking Benjamin

Forever and ever / The scars will remain / I'm falling apart / Leave me here forever in the dark 

Fun fact:  Each room in this video features artwork from a Breaking Benjamin album cover.  Can you spot them all?  Breaking Benjamin has made the list several times this decade so it’s somewhat fitting that they make one final contribution.  “Give Me A Sign” is a song I was destined to love based solely on the song title.  I’m always looking for signs to explain why things are the way they are.  It can be my undoing.  In response to some hurdles I was having trouble getting over, a friend recently suggested that I just “ride the wave.”  I’m going to take him up on that sage advice.  Things may happen for a reason but there doesn’t have to be one.  I don’t need to dissect and analyze everything.  Keep your signs for now, Breaking Benjamin.  C’est la vie.

2. “The Crow & The Butterfly” – Shinedown

Just like a crow chasing the butterfly / Dandelions lost in the summer sky / When you and I were getting high as outer space / I never thought you'd slip away / I guess I was just a little too late

This is another of those Shinedown songs off of The Sound of Madness album that enjoyed some crossover success.  Fun fact: the album is the 2^nd one ever to have 4 singles top the chart.  There is a certain nostalgic appreciation that one can gain from this song.  I know I loved it as soon I heard it and the crow/butterfly analogy is genius.  I’d venture we’ve all been the crow at some point in our lives chasing after a butterfly just out of our grasp.

1. “Kings And Queens” – 30 Seconds To Mars

We were the kings and queens of promise / We were the victims of ourselves / Maybe the children of a lesser God / Between Heaven and Hell.

Anything associated to Jared Leto is pretty much pure gold.  Am I right?  “Kings And Queens” is an eruption of awesomeness.  The buildup lures you in and by the time the full ensemble of instruments and choric chanting takes effect, you’re ready to take on whatever lays before you.  The video for this song perfectly captures the possibility and promise this song inspires.  The song even made its way into my sports consciousness because ESPN uses it as background music during its promotional commercials for the big tennis tournaments it airs.  I couldn’t think of many better songs to close out the final year of Q101’s top 101 songs.

Q101: 2009

How did we get here?

2009 (Or, the year “Wheels” helped resuscitate the corpse of alternative music)

5. “Kristy, Are You Doing Okay?” – The Offspring

A rose that won’t bloom / Winter’s kept you / Don’t waste your whole life trying / To get back what was taken away

The lyrics in this one are pretty easy to connect.  It’s an outreach to a girl who was raped at a young age and the singer feels obvious remorse over his passive reaction to the situation.  I liked the song pretty much right away, but I didn’t know who the group was.  An internal conversation with myself went something like this.  “Hey, wait a minute.  That voice sort of sounds like Dexter Holland’s voice.”  “Nah, it can’t be.  Just listen to the song.”  “No, I really think it is.”  “Since when did The Offspring have a softer side?  Come on, they’re penning the lyrics that will incite the next great riot or accompany some WWE wrestler into the ring.”  “Yeah, you’re probably right.  That mediocre ‘Hammerhead’ song they came out with recently is what I’ve come to expect from them.”  Weeks passed, and I heard the song a few more times.  I still couldn’t shake my belief that maybe, just maybe, it was The Offspring.  Sure, I could’ve just looked up who performed the song.  I have an idiosyncrasy (I know, right?) where sometimes I like to let the discovery of an artist or song come naturally in the flow of the day.  There is fun in the anticipation.  It’s sort of like the notion that the pursuit of something is better than what you’re actually after.  Needless to say, I did eventually discover that “Kristy, Are You Doing Okay?” was by The Offspring.  A mixture of shock and approval ensued.  A meaningful contribution by The Offspring helped serve notice that alternative music wasn't dying.  Those past couple years were pretty rough.  No, the genre wasn’t the vibrant being I had come to love, but it was taken off life support.  My total number of downloaded tracks for this year pales in comparison to the glory years, but the top of the list is certainly worthy of attention.  In an era where my musical tastes were more diversified, that was all I could ask for.

4. “Wheels” – Foo Fighters

Well I wanted something better man / I wished for something new / And I wanted something beautiful / I wished for something true / Been lookin' for a reason man / Something to lose 

Yesyesyesyesyes!  This one’s for you, Mandie.  I couldn’t wait to formally acknowledge the greatness of this song in blog form.  (Mandie has spewed so much vitriol in its direction and I’m not entirely sure why.)  I can honestly say that her disgust had nothing to do with its inclusion in my top 5, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have a little smirk because of it.  I’m very proud to capture some of that past musical nirvana (pun only slightly intended) with the inclusion of a song from one of my old favorites.  I simply adore those stutter stops throughout the song.  Sometimes I find my body rhythmically tensing up in conjunction with the stops as I’m listening along.   Kentucky Fried Chicken.  What does “Wheels” and the Foo Fighters have to do with KFC?  Nothing, but this is 2009, and my family took a vacation to the Smoky Mountains that year.  We toured and ate at the original KFC restaurant along the way.  If ever there was a time to re-enact the scene from Family Guy where Peter tries to meet The Colonel, this was it.  I ordered my meal and made my request, hoping they were familiar with the show and I didn’t sound like too much of an idiot.  (They hadn’t and I did.)

3. “Panic Switch” – Silversun Pickups

When you see yourself in a crowded room / Do your fingers itch? Are you pistol-whipped? / Do you step in line or release the glitch? / Can you fall asleep with a panic switch?

I’ve really grown to like this group.  The lead singer’s voice and their distorted melodies reminded me of one of my favorite groups, the Smashing Pumpkins.  They’ve even got a female band member like the Pumpkins.  Silversun’s emergence also indicated a potential resurgence of the alternative scene for me.  They would never have the impact of someone like The Smashing Pumpkins, Green Day, or even Fall Out Boy, but I was just glad to have a new group I could get behind.  Carnavas was a solid album but Swoon took it up a notch.  “Panic Switch” is meant to represent a nervous breakdown.  You’d like me to launch into some story about how this song symbolizes some moment in my life or parallels some underlying feelings of insanity, wouldn’t you?  Sorry to disappoint.  I may be weird but I ain’t crazy.

2. “Second Chance” – Shinedown

Tell my mother, tell my father / I've done the best I can / To make them realize this is my life / I hope they understand / I'm not angry, I'm just saying / Sometimes goodbye is a second chance

Fun fact: this is the final song legendary disc jockey Casey Kasem played before signing off for the final time.  I can remember eating lunch in my car while attending USF, listening to Shinedown sing about “staring down the barrel of a 45,” and I fully expected them to become just another one of those groups from the early 2000s that would fade away.  “Second Chance” is off The Sound of Madness album, which had some major crossover success.  I know I enjoyed several songs off the album.  The lyrics of this song are ones that I always wanted to sing with some meaning.  Living at home all those years and being frustrated with the way things were going, I had dreams of breaking it off and moving far away to start over.  This is the song I was going to leave them with.  You know now that I’ve moved out but I’m still very much in the area.  I’m close with my family and you can’t deny what feels right.  I know many friends who weren’t as fortunate as I have been.  Some of them barely talk to their siblings or parents.  I know I’ve been blessed and I was raised the right way.  Maybe I never needed a second chance after all.  Here’s a picture taken during that aforementioned family trip to the Smokies.  This was shortly after shaving off all of those glorious shoulder-length locks I had.  I remember we left our house on this trip not knowing our destination.  My boss, in particular, was miffed at the notion of such uncertainty when I told her our “plans.”  What can I say?  That’s just how the Younkers operate sometimes.  I shrugged and told her we didn’t have to decide until we got to a certain fork in the road.  If my dad turned left, it was going to be Gettysburg.  If it was right, we’d see the Smoky Mountains.

1. “Audience Of One” – Rise Against

We're all ok until the day we're not / The surface shines while the inside rots / We raced the sunset and we almost won / We slammed the brakes, but the wheels went on

Here’s another submission for my Mount Rushmore of songs.   Its place on that hollowed monument is pretty secure because I’d arguably call it my favorite song of the decade.  I don’t agree with the decidedly liberal agenda being pushed throughout the video but if a band’s political views were a prerequisite to liking to their music, I suspect there would be very few songs up for top 5 consideration.  There is no doubt that the lyrics are the best part of “Audience of One.”  I could have pasted the full set of lyrics above because they all apply.  Some days, I feel like I’m slowly rotting away.  I just know that something’s missing.  You wouldn’t see it if you weren’t looking for it.  I don’t want to wake up one day wishing I could’ve done it all differently.  I feel like I’ve positioned myself nicely for a fulfilling life.  I’ve made good choices and tried to do it the right way.  Does it get better?  Tell me I’m on the right track.  I’m sure there’s a greater plan in the works and nobody likes a backseat driver; I’d just like to know where we’re going.  This song represents the natural progression of life.  You drift apart from many people that you knew.  I’m sure I’ve broached the subject before in prior blogs but it’s rather difficult to make new friends after college and it only gets harder with each passing year.  Have you met people recently through mutual friends?  Are you now hanging out together?  Doubt it.  If so, you’re much better at life than I am.  You just have to hope that you’ve still got an audience to play in front of when the dust settles.  For most people, this is a spouse and kids.  My two best friends growing up, Matt and Tom, have since moved to away (to Texas and Bloomington, respectively).  Matt has been happily married for years and Tom probably will be sooner than later.  I guess I’ve never really replaced them.  Your wife and kids should be the most important part of your life, and I’d be fully committed to mine like any good husband and dad.  It’s selfish for us out there on our own to expect the attention we used to get.  I’m reasonable, if nothing else.  A blog with limited followers has prepared me to accept my audience of one but I don’t ever want to be OK with it.  Life can be a long trip by yourself.  Maybe you’ll just let me ride along once in a while. 

Q101: 2008

How did we get here?

2008 (Or, the year even old favorites such as Foo Fighters, Weezer, or Linkin Park couldn’t relight the extinguished flame of alternative music that once guided me through life)

5. “Breakdown” – Seether

So break me down if it makes your feel right / And hate me now if it keeps you alright

Seether finds itself on my countdowns more often than I would have guessed.  I’m definitely going to cite subpar competition as the reason for their inclusion in this particular installment.  2008 offers a slightly better top 5 than 2007 but the year’s overall contribution shall not stand the test of time.  I could go about 15 deep on my 2008 rankings and any of those songs could make the top 5 depending on the day you asked.  I ultimately settled on “Breakdown” because it was my favorite (at the time) of the 3 Seether songs I put in the top 15.  Thus, I felt something off the Finding Beauty in Negative Spaces album deserved some recognition.  Fun fact (opinion?):  it’s been said the song is about Shaun Morgan’s ex, Amy Lee of Evanescence.

4. “Sometime Around Midnight” – The Airborne Toxic Event

And all of these memories come rushing like feral waves to your mind / Of the curl of your bodies, like two perfect circles entwined / And you feel hopeless, and homeless, and lost in the haze of the wine

“Sometime Around Midnight” has made a slow, steady ascent up my personal charts from when I first heard it.  I find myself gaining a stronger appreciation for what it represents as I mature.  There is a certain trendy coolness that I’ve decided accompanies the song.  In my mind, I’ve validated myself among the musical snobs by including it in my top 5.  It’s pretty much the exact opposite effect of including another Nickelback song (I only had one!).  The song was written by the lead singer in isolation after seeing a former girlfriend at a bar and discovering he still had feelings for her.  I haven’t decided if the singer has eloquently described the situation unfolding around him in perfect detail or if he’s swept up by a suffocating paranoia.  Either way, I think it’s brilliant.  These are exactly the sort of thoughts my imagination would invent.  Is she going out of her way to make sure I see her or am I so fixated on her that I can see nothing else?  That’s just a sampling of the mess my brain always seems to find itself in.

3. “Calling All Skeletons” – Alkaline Trio

Here it is again yet it stings like the first time / Seems it never ends, double nickels on your dime / I thought we were friends, I guess it just depends who you ask / These feelings tend to leave me with a hole in my chest

It’s my belief that Alkaline Trio probably got more play on Q101 than they did nationally simply because they’re a local band.  That’s a shame because their work is good enough to demand a larger audience.  Agony & Irony is a pretty solid album top to bottom.  I so wish “Love Love, Kiss Kiss” had made Q101’s list because that’s a song I’ve drank away many a lonely night to.  It’s playing in my head every time I go a wedding or see a public display of affection on my Facebook feed.  It’s nothing against the happy couple.  My feelings of melancholy and jealousy do not discriminate.  I’ll wish you and your significant other a long and prosperous future together and I will truly mean it because I don’t seek to deny anyone the right to be happy.  However, if a war ever broke out between the Singles and the Relationships, I’ll proudly fight side by side along the throngs of my tribe.  We may be friends in times of peace, but I’ll thrust my bayonet deep into your chest should we come face to face on the battlefield.  I wonder which side would be favored in such an epic clash.  One side has something tangible to fight for while the other side has a cause and feelings of oppression spurring it onward.  The Relationships will have the advantage of teamwork, but the Singles have developed a sense of adaptation that would translate well in the trenches.  I should probably stop now before my “taken” friends start to fear for their lives.  You two make a great couple!  Don’t you think Alkaline Trio is an underrated group?!  They don’t make you think about killing at all! .... Um, sure, Dave, they’re alright. I, uh, just remembered I left the, uh, door to the, uh, parakeet cage slightly ajar and I need to go make sure the bird hasn’t flown away. … But you don’t own any pets. … I’m bird-sitting for my next door neighbor.  … But your next door neighbors don’t own any pets.  I’ve met them, remember? … Gotta go.

2. “Love Me Dead” – Ludo

Love me cancerously, like a salt sore soaked in the sea / High maintenance means you’re a gluttonous queen, narcissistic and mean

After watching the video for this song, I came to the conclusion that these guys had a ton of fun making that video and I’m convinced the lead singer could launch a successful career on the Broadway stage if he so chose.  I just think they’d be some cool guys to hang out with.  I was glad when Mandie included this song in her ’08 top 5 and her stories seemed to confirm my thoughts about the group.  The posted lyrics for “Love Me Dead” are just a small example of the eerie serenading often exhibited in a Ludo song.  You really need to listen to “The Horror of Our Love” for a complete appreciation of the band.  You will never hear love described in such a beautifully creepy manner.  Both songs are off the You’re Awful, I Love You album (did you expect a different title?), which earns my full endorsement.  I worked the Sunday morning shift at Sports Authority for several years and was responsible for setting part of the weekly sales ad.  We started pretty early in the morning and the employees were granted control of the music until the store opened.  I had some Ludo songs on my mix CDs and I remember being extremely self-conscious whenever something like “The Horror of Our Love” came on.  I just knew I was going to have explain myself for what I was subjecting these people’s ears to.  It ranks right up there with the orgasmic beginning of White Zombie’s “More Human Than Human.”  Fortunately, nobody is really listening to the lyrics of anything at 6 in the morning.  Ludo – what a weird little band. 

1. “Cath…” – Death Cab For Cutie

The whispers that it won't last roll up and down the pews / But if their hearts were dying that fast / They'd have done the same as you / And I'd have done the same as you

I first became aware of Ben Gibbard through his side work with The Postal Service.  It was solid stuff but nothing game-changing.  I guess that’s how I feel about Death Cab.  “Cath…” fought off some weak competition to claim the top spot of 2008.  I sympathize with the song’s subject, a woman who is marrying out of desperation.  He isn’t her ideal suitor but she recognizes the clock is ticking.  I realize that my clock is ticking; I’m not 21 anymore.  No, I’m not looking to get married tomorrow or even in the next few months.  If you know one thing about me, it’s that I never rush into anything.  It takes me a while to find somebody I like and often even longer to work up the courage to ask them out, if ever.  I’m getting better at it…I think.  I can’t possibly imagine how long it would take me to arrive at a proposal.  I guess I’ve just finally reached a point in my life where marriage is something I’d like to at least pretend I’m working towards.  I guess the one difference between Cath and I is that I won’t marry out of desperation.  If it doesn’t happen, then I’ll accept that.  There is no rule that says happiness comes from marriage; I’m just taking my best guess, like everyone else, at how to achieve it for myself.  I don’t know what my future holds, but I do know that it’s short-sighted to close the door on any potential outcomes simply because it’s convenient to do so.  You have to allow for change in yourself and you have to be willing to let things happen to you.  

Q101: 2007

How did we get here?

2007 (Or, the year alternative music careened off a cliff and could no longer be my sole provider of audio goodness)

5. “Phantom Limb” – The Shins

So when they tap our Monday heads / Two zombies walk in our stead / This town seems hardly worth the time / And we'll no longer memorize or rhyme / Too far along in our climb / Stepping over what now towers to the sky / With no connection

I sat there staring at this song for a while.  “Phantom Limb” really cracked my top 5?  There had to be some mistake.  I looked back over the list of songs for 2007.  Yeah, there’s nothing else I would really want to replace it with.  I’m starting to see why I’ve migrated to country music in recent years.  Don’t get me wrong; I like this song.  I’ll sing along with the ooooooh waoooo waoooo's as much as the next guy.  It just doesn’t seem like top 5 material.  I associate it with the time I was between jobs after college and not doing much of anything with my life.  I was, at least, working out on a regular basis with my friend Tom and I recall this song being queued up on his playlist shuffle.  But the weird thing is that I was already working at Applied when the single was released so my memory must be off.  I had never seen the video for this song until writing this piece.  If you like little kids dramatically re-enacting the burning of Joan of Arc and the Spanish conquest of the Aztecs, this video is for you.  The band’s lead singer described the song as “a hypothetical, fictional account of a young, lesbian couple in high school dealing with the shitty small town they live in.”  Alright then.

4. “Misery Business” – Paramore

I'm in the business of misery / Let's take it from the top / She's got a body like an hourglass, it's ticking like a clock / It's a matter of time before we all run out

Hayley Williams is cute in her own right, even with her bizarre hair color.  She’s not I’d-crawl-through-a-mile-of-broken-glass-on-my-hands-and-knees-just-to-jerk-off-in-her-shadow cute but she’s I’d-let-her-cut-me-in-line-at-the-grocery-store cute.  How someone so tiny can produce such a powerful voice is beyond me.  Riot! is a pretty solid album worth a listen if you get a chance. 

3. “Your Guardian Angel” – The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

Use me as you will / Pull my strings just for a thrill / And I know I'll be okay / Though my skies are turning gray

The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus’ Don’t You Fake It album produced several enjoyable singles, including this one.  “False Pretense” is a great workout song I can use to get pumped up.  “Your Guardian Angel” is not, but I like the slow acoustic buildup to the eventual rock part of the song.  Since 2007 doesn’t offer a lot musically for me to write about, I’m going to share another story that probably happened around this time.

Let me preface this story by saying the main character is truly one of a kind.  I guarantee you don’t know anyone quite like Timmy K in your circle of friends.  Chances are you won’t fully appreciate this unless you know him but I’ll do my best with my limited writing abilities to paint the picture.  We went out to Jamerson’s in Joliet to celebrate someone’s birthday.  Tim doesn’t like to drink unless we pressure him into it.   As such, he is often a good choice as the DD.  On this particular night, we coerced him into having a Captain & Coke.  We knew we’d be there for a few hours and this was early in the night.  Tim was only able to finish half of the drink.  Tim is someone who likes to talk…a lot…and really fast.  You might be inclined to think he’s the tipsy one when, in fact, he’s the only one who isn’t.  An officer certainly did.  On our way home on I-80, Tim was driving. My brother was in the passenger seat while I was sitting in the back along with my sister’s boyfriend.  I saw a cop car pulled off to the side of the road a few hundred yards before our exit.  I distinctly remember thinking to suggest that Tim get in the left lane as a courtesy, but not specifically because it was a cop.  It was so close to our exit though that I decided to remain quiet.  As we pull off the interstate, we see the lights start flashing behind us.  The officer approaches the car and the situation unfolds like this (the words in parentheses are what I was thinking).

Officer:  Are you aware of Scott’s Law?  (What the heck is he talking about?  I’m sure we’re about to find out though.)

Tim:  No, sir.

Officer:  If there is an officer pulled over on the side of the road and you are able to safely get over in the other lane, you must do so by law.

Tim:  I, uh, didn’t know that.

Officer:  So where you guys coming from?

Tim says nothing and looks to Dan for assistance. (That’s right, officer.  We have nothing to hide here.)

Dan:  (like he’s talking to a child) The officer is talking to you, Tim.

Tim:  (sounding unsure of himself) Jameson’s

Officer:  (casually) Oh yeah, the bar.  So have you boys been drinking any?

Tim:  A little

Officer:  (eyebrow raised) What’s a little?

Tim:  (clearly flustered) Half a Captain (And?...Annnd?...He means Captain AND Coke...Dear god, Tim, finish the sentence.)

Officer:  Sir, I need you to step out of the car.

Unfortunately, we can’t hear the rest of the conversation between Tim and the officer.  I can only go on what Tim told us after the fact.  We do see Tim “walk the line” and appear to take the breathalyzer test a couple times.  He comes back to the car trying to act all cool but is obviously still shaken.

Dan:  So what happened?  You took a breathalyzer test it looked like.

Tim:  (sounding really, really proud of himself) Yeah, I aced that thing.

Dan:  What did you blow?

Tim:  Zero point zero zero.

As we all take a moment to let that sink in and begin to start dying of laughter, Tim continues.

Tim:  Yeah, the officer was sure there was a glitch so he made me blow again.  Still nothing.  He wrote me a ticket for the Scott’s Law thing and then told me to get my ass out of here. (Yeah, he’s probably pissed because he was all ready to drop the hammer with the DUI.)

We begin to drive home but Tim is white-knuckling the steering wheel.  He’s clearly bothered by the whole experience.  After less than a mile, he pulls over and my sister’s boyfriend drove the rest of the way home.  The positioning of the cop so close to our exit and the timing of us passing him were really bad luck.  He had just finished the interaction with the previous person he had pulled over.  A minute or two earlier and he would’ve still been tied up with the other person.  A minute or two later and he’d have been long gone.  That’s the kind of luck and timing that would afflict me but I was just an observer this time.  Timmy K – perhaps the only person to ever blow triple zero and I’m proud to say I was there for it. 

Although it doesn’t directly impact the preceding story, driving is another one of Tim’s skill sets that could use some refining.  I could give you a few of those stories too but I’ll give you this picture of a park job he did for our annual Labor Day party (although I’m sure it was for shock value as much as anything).

2. “Snow (Hey Oh)” – Red Hot Chili Peppers

When will I know that I really can't go / To the well once more time to decide on / When it's killing me, when will I really see / All that I need to look inside?

RHCP just keeps rolling along, don’t they?  I feel like they’ll still be producing music when I’m 50, essentially making them my generation’s version of the Rolling Stones.  I wouldn’t place them amongst my favorite groups but they’ve contributed as much to my music library as anybody else I suppose.  The 2-disc release of Stadium Arcadium is the only full album I have by the Chili Peppers.   As for the thoughts evoked with this particular song, there is something refreshing about a fresh blanket of white, fallen snow.  It’s like a blank canvas you get to start over with.  Every time I’m the one who screws up a relationship (which is every time), I try to convince myself that I’ll get another chance to construct my masterpiece.  The problem is that I don’t really understand art and I suck at it.  I’ve stumbled upon several different ways to screw up my relationships while trying to play Picasso; I never cease to amaze myself in that regard.  Maybe next time I just need to throw some splotches down and call it done.  That’s considered abstract art these days, right?  Explain to me how in the hell that qualifies as… oh, never mind.

1. “Breath” – Breaking Benjamin

You take the breath right out of me / You left a hole where my heart should be

I’m sure we’ve all felt this way at one time or another.  “Breath” would certainly be included on my designated coping playlist.  Breaking Benjamin makes my top 5 for the 3^rd year in a row.  They’re the only group that can stake such a claim across all the Q101 years.  I’m not sure if that’s a testament to them or a by-product of the declining alternative music industry I was finding myself in.  This is a great song that deserves more words of praise but I’m ready to leave this disappointing year behind us.

Q101: 2006

How did we get here?

2006 (Or, the year I started to notice some chinks in the alternative music armor)

5. “Lips Of An Angel” – Hinder

It's really good to hear your voice saying my name / It sounds so sweet / Coming from the lips of an angel / Hearing those words it makes me weak

We all know the song is about sweet, seductive infidelity with a former love but the lyrics aren’t why I enjoy listening to it.  I may have a lot of faults as a potential boyfriend but being unfaithful would never be one of them.  Besides, I have a different word association for this song: racquetball.  When “Lips of an Angel” came out, my friend Tom and I played racquetball at Governors State on a semi-regular basis. I really enjoy playing tennis and this was the best alternative in the winter.  If your opponent in racquetball impedes your ability to make a play on the ball, you are allowed to claim a “hinder”, which essentially allows for a redo.  Naturally, this happened on a few occasions.  We eventually made the connection between that call and the band.  One day, one of us decided to belt out the lyric “It’s really good to hear your voice” in substitution of “hinder.”  From that point forward, it became mandatory to use that line whenever you wanted to claim a hindrance, and you had to do it in a grungy voice so as to imitate the lead singer.  I really do miss those days; I never get to play racquetball, or tennis for that matter, anymore.

4. “Chasing Cars” – Snow Patrol

If I lay here/ If I just lay here / Would you lie with me / And just forget the world?

Have you ever heard a song that you just knew was going to explode?  I first heard this song on TV during a promo for Grey’s Anatomy.  I’ve never watched an episode of Grey’s Anatomy but I knew it was fairly popular.  I knew the prime time TV exposure that “Chasing Cars” had just received was going to catapult it across the airwaves.  Its inclusion on a list of alternative music is a bit questionable but that demonstrates the kind of crossover power the song possessed.  A variety of stations and entertainment venues played the song…all the time.  That type of force-feeding will often turn people off a song.  It’s the rebellious little kid in all of us.  Oh, I’m supposed to like this song?  Is that why you keep playing it?  Well, screw you.  I’m an original.  There may have even been a time when I too was sick of “Chasing Cars” but I came back once the song ran through its course.  It must be something about the slow, dreamy buildup that whisks me away.  There’s a romantic notion of lying there next to someone when nothing else matters except the two of you together and that very moment.  I’d like to believe that I can capture that essence one day.  Until then, I’ll keep chasing after it.

3. “Rooftops” – Lostprophets

When our time is up / When our lives are done / Will we say we've had our fun / Will we make a mark this time / Will we always say we tried

Who among us hasn’t wanted to stand on a rooftop and scream their heart out?  My generation is here to stay and now you know.  I don’t have any deep personal connection with this song so I’ll instead focus on an adventure that occurred in 2006: my first trip to a strip club.  A group of us from the softball team I was on at the time decided we needed to cross this off our bucket list.  Our destination was The Silver Slipper Saloon.  As I mentioned in 2004’s installment, the team was comprised of people from Peotone and Braidwood.  Some of the Braidwood guys were pretty nerdy, even by my standards.  There was a draw to see who would be forced to ride in the “other” car with those guys and my prevailing luck naturally saw to it that I would be that person.  After a lengthy ride of listening to conversation about computers and online gaming, I was ready to see some naked ladies.  I had no idea what the pricing structure would be but I brought in a set amount of cash that I hoped would be enough to last the entire night.  I wisely left my wallet in the car so I wouldn’t be tempted into spending an exorbitant amount of money.  Even before I got in, I was forced to dip into my funds.  It turned out that one of the “other” guys hadn’t brought any cash with him (say what?) and therefore couldn’t meet the cover charge.  I covered him because I’m a nice guy and didn’t want anyone to be deprived of a little fun.  Incidentally, this is the same guy who later refused a lap dance because “he was driving.”  Gee, I’m sure glad I helped you get in.  Why exactly did you come?  A portly fellow from our group named Hipple was the first one to receive a lap dance.  As we curiously watched from a distance, he and the stripper sat there and they were…talking?  What the hell could they possibly be talking about we all asked aloud.  Is she an online gamer too?  As newbies, none of us were really sure how the transaction was supposed to be completed but we knew a step or two had to be missing.  It wasn’t until Hipple returned that we discovered dances are by the song so she had to wait until the next song began.  I’m sure I was probably the thousandth person to think I was being clever when I suggested that someone request something like “Freebird” before my lap dance.  I made it through the night on my predetermined budget; I didn’t need to run out to the car after 30 minutes to grab my debit card but I saw it happen.  I found that it was more cost effective to sit by the stage shelling out singles or fives rather than receive individual lap dances.  I even got to sit next to someone who bore a striking resemblance to 50 Cent.  I can say I had a good time but I don’t really have any desire to do it again.  I went just once more the following year and I’ve turned down countless other offers to go since.  You just feel so…unclean…coming out of those places.  I’d need to do some volunteer work just to cleanse my soul and appease my conscience.  Plus, let’s be real.  A little piece of me dies every time I open my wallet.  Sorry, strippers, I’ve decided you’re not worth it.  P.S. Mom, I'm still a good kid.

2. “The Diary Of Jane” – Breaking Benjamin

As I burn another page / As I look the other way / I still try to find my place in the diary of Jane / So tell me how it should be

This is my favorite Breaking Benjamin song.  I liked it immediately from the sound to the lyrics.  I feel bad that I don’t have any interesting story related to share about this song, but I’ve already written a lot above so I can guess I’ve earned the right to breeze through this one.  I will say that anytime someone devotes the time to write about you, either directly or by reference, I think that’s a pretty cool thing.  I’m not talking about a few thoughtless sentences on Facebook that any hack could compose in a matter of minutes.  I mean an actual entry into something like a private diary or online blog.  Writing is a form of expressing yourself and the subject matter should feel honored that they had enough of an impact to make it onto the pages of someone’s work.  You don't come across many people who write out their thoughts and feelings these days unless they're trying to make some money out of it.  You certainly don't see many guys who do it, and I like to think that sets me apart.  Maybe in a good way, maybe in a bad way.  You can decide. 

1. “Over My Head (Cable Car)” – The Fray

I never knew that everything was falling through / That everyone I knew was waiting on a queue / To turn and run when all I needed was the truth / But that's how it's got to be / It's coming down to nothing more than apathy

I play the song when courting a  girl or preparing for a date with one as a means of reverse psychology to convince myself that I’m actually not in over my head.  Contrary to what the lyrics may lead you to believe, the song isn't about a relationship with a woman.  It's about lead singer Isaac Slade’s other brother (nicknamed Cable Car) with whom he’d had a falling out.  You mean all those times I was incorrectly applying the song?  No!  I won’t accept that.  Tom and I both came to the conclusion that this song had tremendous staying power.  It’s the kind of song I could hear a hundred times and never tire of, and I never have.  By comparison, The Fray’s follow-up single, “How to Save a Life”, followed the aforementioned path of “Chasing Cars”.  Their self-titled album is one that I often find myself coming back to.  I think I’m a sucker for alternative music infused with a piano.  Perhaps it’s because I’ve always had a dream of learning that instrument.  If “Over My Head” comes on when I’m listening to music at work, you’ll likely see me tapping my fingers on the desk as if I’m playing the piano along with the song.  It’s often an involuntary action; I hear the song and my fingers go to work.  Fun fact:  the kid in the video is actually Slade’s younger brother.  

Q101: 2005

How did we get here?

2005 (Or, the year Fall Out Boy became so much more than a sidekick to Radioactive Man)

5. “Sooner Or Later” – Breaking Benjamin

Sooner or later / You're gonna hate it / Go ahead and throw our life away / Driving me under / Leaving me out there / Go ahead and throw our life away

First, I’d like to offer a tip of the cap to Green Day who put 2 songs into my top 10 for 2005.  Interestingly, “Sooner or Later” is one of three songs that Mandie I shared in our top 5 for this year (along with my #3 and #1).  Breaking Benjamin is just one of those groups I’m supposed to like, right? I’ve never heard an alternative music fan say anything negative about them.  I must admit that I haven’t dug much deeper into these guys than their singles.  Maybe I should because many of them rank highly on my personal lists.

4. “Photograph” – Nickelback

Every memory of lookin' out the back door / I have the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor / It's hard to say it / Time to say it / Good bye, good bye

Whoa, wait a minute.  A Nickelback song?!  I’m certainly not a Nickelback apologist, but I must interject before you roll your eyes and vehemently protest the remainder of this list or mini-series.  Somewhere along the line, Nickelback became this decade’s version of Creed.  It became trendy to bash them and point to their existence as everything that’s wrong with modern rock music.  You wouldn’t be caught dead listening to them.  Except that you probably did once upon a time.  You may run from your past but I’m not going to.  If you distance yourself from it, it’s like it never happened right?  Nickelback’s initial sound was too unrefined for my liking and now they are puppets of the blurred pop/rock radio sound (oops, there I go too).  But there was a window in there when All the Right Reasons was released that I appreciated their work.  It’s sort of appropriate that I get to discuss this song now.  As part of my move into my new house, I packed and unpacked various items that hadn’t been seen in years – high school yearbooks, basketball card collections, old jerseys from sports teams I played on.  Like most people, I paused to take a look and reflect.  Memories came flooding back in.  If you’re feeling particularly nostalgic, “Photograph” can accompany your trip down memory lane.  I could write you pages of stories from my past but, as they say, a picture is worth a thousand words.

3. “Work” – Jimmy Eat World

Can't say I was never wrong / But some blame rests on you / Work and play they're never okay / To mix the way we do

I was pleased when this song snuck its way into Q101’s top 101 for this year because that meant that I got to include it here.  Futures is one of my favorite albums, and “Work” has always been a song that reassured me of myself.  The posted lyrics were always my justification for my rule of not dating co-workers.  Every good rule needs a supporting argument and I fashioned Jimmy Eat World were as good an expert as any to cite.  I’ve begun to revisit all of my rules recently.  I’ve even broken a couple of them; the results have been mixed but I regret nothing.  Maybe I’m turning a page in my life.  I even considered clearing the slate of strikes that people have accumulated and scrapping the system altogether, but that would be lunacy.  People MUST know there are consequences for their actions.  Turning a page?  Maybe not.

2. “Scars” – Papa Roach

I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut / And my weakness is that I cared too much / And our scars remind us that the past is real / I tear my heart open just to feel

Fun fact:  Papa Roach lead singer Jacoby Shaddix credits this song as the one that saved his life after a particularly crazy night in Vegas.  It’s about trying to help someone who really doesn’t want the help.  We’ve all got our own scars from the past, so we can all relate to the song in some way.  Caring too much isn’t a fault I’ve typically been accused of.  I’ve mentioned before that I’ve never had my heart broken but that’s just another way of saying that I never really tried to let someone in.  To quote one of my favorite movies High Fidelity:  “I guess it made more sense to commit to nothing, keep my options open.  And that's suicide.  By tiny, tiny increments.”  My scars are far less visible to the naked eye but a million tiny paper cuts doesn’t hurt any less.  Anybody got any Band-Aids?  Never mind.  I’d be too stubborn to use them anyway.

1. “Sugar, We’re Goin Down” – Fall Out Boy

We're going down, down in an earlier round / And Sugar, we're going down swinging / I'll be your number one with a bullet / A loaded god complex, cock it and pull it

I was looking someone to carry the torch forward and become a new go-to group.  One day, I saw the video for “Sugar We’re Goin Down” and I was amused by the story of a boy with antlers being looked at disapprovingly by his girlfriend’s father only to find out the father ended up having hooves himself.  More importantly, I took notice of the song itself and I wanted to know more about this band.  “Dance, Dance” and “A Little Less Sixteen Candles…” (which is a pretty cool video in its own right and deserves your time below) eventually satisfied my rule of 3 so From Under the Cork Tree was purchased.   It did not disappoint.   The album could be played in a variety of settings regardless of my mood.  I particularly enjoy listening to it this song while driving in the car with the windows down.  I also appreciated Fall Out Boy’s cheeky, verbose song titles, such as “Our Lawyer Made Us Change the Name of This Song So We Wouldn’t Get Sued.”  A new go-to group had indeed emerged.